November 23, 2025
In the contemporary epoch, the best escape from the absurdity of our existence is to be found in individuality, which is derived from free will. But do we humans actually possess free will? Or do we even have the conscious self to truly contemplate the mere meaning of our existence?
I have been introspecting on this question, and unfortunately, I always end up in a loop that seems to go on infinitely. Like in our infancy, we are forced to shape ourselves according to our surroundings. Specifically, being an Asian, my religion, my definition of love and hate, my perspective of other individuals will apparently depend on my guardians, where the ultimate submission of will is deemed respectful. However, with time, when you start exploring different horizons that gradually expand your exposure and make you humble towards alien entities, you get to know that all the subjective perspectives were far away from the actual realities of this chaotic and ruthless world. All those humans whom you were ready to behead were your siblings from common ancestors dating back to apes. All those shared myths we had faith in were mere tales created to subjugate us and to monopolize for nefarious purposes.
And then we are left with the trap of our individuality or more precisely, the free will which we don’t actually have. The essence of this so-called free will lies in the idea that we decide independently without any influence , cultural biases , or upbringings . However, the modern form of capitalism holds enough power to mold your free will in its own favor. These tech giants can normalize anything they want by showing it to you again and again. Everything — literally EVERYTHING — around us is influenced, either by culture, religion, or individuals. We weep at someone’s death because we attended funerals where everyone was mourning. We share Gulab Jamun at someone’s birth because we grew up seeing it celebrated this way So the question here is, why weep when something inevitable like death takes away all the sorrows from someone’s life and sets them free? Why celebrate the arrival of an innocent child in this cruel world, where he or she has to suffer throughout life just to survive?
Thus, the relative definitions of happiness, sadness, love, hate, success, etc., are more of a projection of our society than our own will. Maybe our standard of happiness lies in coexisting with the humans in our circle, but it’s okay if we are not, because in the end, nothing actually matters. Some do claim that even if we are influenced, we still have the power of conscious awareness, which is the ability to step back and question. Maybe that itself is a form of free will, but then again the same question bothers me that, from where does this 'conscious awareness' come? So, apparently, we can never escape this influence because biologically these three hormones named as Serotonin, Oxytocin, and Dopamine , are the factors that control our subjective emotions via our brain. This proves the notion of the division of the heart and brain as separate conscious entities false, because our mind has the capacity to process and decide, whereas the heart is solely responsible for pumping blood, which is controlled through our brain. Any escalation in it doesn't mean our heart has conscious ability; all of it is simply a catalyst of our mind.
So, all of this introspection was not meant to put you into any more quagmire of existential crisis but to make you more humble and empathetic. Nothing here is absolute, maybe the arguments I’m trying to yap about are mere abstractions of my mind but why should we care? We are here for an ephemeral period so we simply should live through it with peace and civility.
~ Mohsin